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6 of the Best Stories to Come out of the Super League Fiasco

Written by Stakester
20 Apr, 2021

The footballing world is reeling in shock as some of the top teams in club football have announced their plans to form a breakaway league. The “European Super League” will feature the likes of Barcelona, Real Madrid ,Juventus and the top 6 from the Premier League, as founding members of a new ‘elite’ competition.

Many questions have arisen, such as whether players will be able to take part in FIFA’s prestigious World Cup, UEFA’s Champions league or even these clubs’ respective domestic competitions. It’s the biggest story to hit the football world for years, and rumours are flying!

To keep you on the straight and narrow, we scoured social media to find the 6 most entertaining stories to come out of this Super League drama – here’s what we found.

England at the Euros

On Sunday night, questions quickly arose over players’ eligibility to take part in the upcoming UEFA Euros. The English national team will obviously suffer heavily if a ban is enforced on players from top 6 clubs – that’s hundreds of millions of pounds of unavailable talent. Southgate must be sweating through his waistcoat! Don’t worry, Gareth, – we’ve got you covered with this best-of-the-rest teamsheet.

Arsenal’s Brookstein Bashing

One of the weirder moments of the aftermath was the reappearance of Steve Brookstein (now there’s a name you weren’t expecting to see in this blog). The first ever X Factor winner replied to Arsenal’s announcement and said “The last time you won the league I won X Factor. You’re more embarrassing than my career. Chancers.”.

It’s safe to say that Steve’s tweet was much more well received than Arsenal’s. So, we’re keeping our fingers crossed for the 2022 comeback tour. 

The Downfall of FIFA 22

You can always rely on us to get to the heart of these issues: so what exactly will this will mean for FIFA 22? Will we see our favourite teams and players in the next instalment, or will the game never be the same again? You might assume that the 12 clubs simply won’t feature in EA’s next game. But, we could see some genius renaming trickery of the sort that saw Juventus’ renamed Piemonte Calcio this year.

If that’s the plan, then we’ve got PES-style names for the top 6 English teams – with a bit of extra shade thrown in:

  • Arsenal – No Trophy Reds
  • Chelsea – London Blues
  • Liverpool – Anfield Historians
  • Manchester City – Manchester est. 2012
  • Manchester United – Trad Brick Bottlers
  • Tottenham Hotspur – London Impostors

Mourinho’s Training Ground Debacle

In a stunning move, Spurs bosses sent Jose Mourinho packing early yesterday morning. There were rumours circulating that this was because he had refused to take the team out for training. As much as we all wanted to believe, this turned out to be tall tale spread by a high level troll account. However, as they often do, mainstream media outlets covered themselves in glory by picking up the story and running with it!

The account (now suspended) claimed to be Chief European Sport Correspondent for the Economist, but that role doesn’t even exist. Although the story was fabricated, Mourinho being sacked was a very real occurrence, it’ll be interesting to see if any of the other managers of “the founding 12” will follow suit. 

Do der Hokey Cokey 

So far, Germany has been a bastion of strength in the fight against the avaricious owners of the founding 12. Both Bayern Munich and Borussia Dortmund have reportedly refused to join forces with them, stating that they are firmly against the idea of a European Super League. However, rumours continue to circulate that 3 clubs are still to join the competition, so it is not totally impossible that the 2 German sides will end up involved. And so the question remains, are they in or are they out?

So to honour their stand against footballing madness, here’s Bill Bailey’s German rendition of the Hokey Cokey, just because.

Government Intervention

Boris Johnson has been very vocal about his opposition to the proposed Super League format. The Prime Minister has said he will do all that he can to ensure that the Super League doesn’t go ahead in its “current format”. However, Jamie Carragher became even more incensed when the PM got involved, calling him out on Twitter (now deleted) and accusing him of being a charlatan – honestly, this is more entertaining than Corrie.

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